My parents are getting older and I don’t want to watch them deteriorate. I work with the elderly, so I know what to look for. I look at people and I think, “You’re probably gonna get this disease, or this disease.” My residents’ children sometimes say to me, “I’m the mother now,” but the residents will also say, “My mom’s picking me up.” Sometimes they’re cool with it, sometimes it’s tough–the ones who are more with it will catch themselves, like, “I mean my daughter, my daughter.”
As we grow with our families, our relationships morph. We know who raised us and who we are raising, but these connections are based more on reciprocal nurture than power. We also know that the nurture and care we need changes as we get older and that’s okay. We receive care from the ones we raised into caring creatures. It doesn’t matter who or what or how old. What matters is returning care.